But, before you use these books, you need to know the definition of bullying, which consists of these three parts

• The behavior is intended to harm or disturb, or the individual targets feels harmed, disturbed or embarrassed.

• The behavior occurs repeatedly and over time. (It can’t just happen once.)

• There is an imbalance of power (power based on size, age, social status, wealth, intelligence, appearance, wardrobe, just to name a few).

The old stereotypical bullying event usually contained a big kid standing over a little kid saying, “Give me your lunch money” If we look at the above definition, it is easy to see that the behavior is intended to cause harm, the little kid would not get lunch and possibly be humiliated publicly, That alone would not make it bullying, but it usually happens several times a week, and the imbalance of power seen in the size difference between a big kid and a small kid is obvious.

Name-calling, the most common form of bullying in children and adults, can be heard on school playgrounds or in middle school and high school hallways or in the workplace. The words hurt and are heard often, and are usually delivered by a person with power over the target.  Most people who are called names don’t tell anyone because they are embarrassed.

If two students who are friends have an argument that ends up in name-calling—that probably will not be bullying. They will resolve the conflict and continue the friendship. The words may have been intended to harm, but the event happened in one setting and between two equals.

Most people still believe the many myths about bullying.

• The bully usually has a poor self-concept—MYTH. The Elitist Bully or Social Climber Bully spends so much time thinking about him/herself, there isn’t any time left to think about others.

• Bullying will make the targeted child stronger—MYTH. Bullying can destroy lives. The word bullycide (also bullicide), being bullied to the point where killing oneself is the only perceived escape, has been added to our language. The web site www.bullyonline.org has a memorial page that lists children and teens that have lost their lives because of bullying.

New research on bullying tells us that this problem is not going away. Those of us who work with children of all ages need to educate ourselves.  For far too long school staffs have been correctly accused of doing nothing. THAT IS NO LONGER AN OPTION. Start by reading a bully book with your class so that you can encourage a discussion before you have to discipline the problem. Keep a list of bully books available so when you hear a kid is having a problem you can share that book. Literature has always been a bridge, and bully books can help targeted students, confused bystanders and even active bullies cross to a healthier place.

Latest Finds...

June / July, 2009

Lockdown by Diane Tullson,

Trapped in the hallway, Adam and Zoe think the school lockdown is just another drill, until they hear gunshots. When Adam realizes he knows the shooter, he tries to stop him. For Middle School and High School. Orca Soundings, 2008.

Jerk, California by Jonathan Friesen,

Life is hard for Sam who has Tourette syndrome and an abusive, hate-filled stepfather who rules Sam’s mom and lies about Sam’s father. After his high school graduation, Sam leaves and takes a job with a crusty old landscaper who knew his father and who enables Sam to take a trip to discover the truth about himself and his dad. For Middle School and High School. An odyssey book. Puffin, 2008.

In Our Mothers' House by Patricia Polacco,

A narrator tells the story of her loving mothers who adopted her and later, two other children to complete their happy family. Polacco’s books are always beautiful. Philomel Books/Penguin, 2009.

Daddy, Papa, and Me by Lesléa Newman, illustrated by Carol Thompson,

“Me,” a voice of a toddler, tells what the day is like with two fathers. Simple language and colorful illustrations. Tricycle Press, 2009.

A parallel book to Daddy, Papa, and Me, a toddler tells the story of a day with two mothers. Simple language and colorful illustrations. Tricycle Press, 2009.